Evil Scarecrow – Silicon Tea
Evil Scarecrow – Silicon Tea
Deadbox Records
Release Date: 01/10/2025
Review by Adam Robinson
SEX, SEX, SEX BOTS! SEX, SEX, SEX, BOTS! SEX, SEX, SEX, BOTS! WELLYYYYYY!
*Cough*, excuse me, I needed to get that out of my system.
Cards on the table, I am writing this as a MASSIVE Evil Scarecrow fan, I’ve been crab dancing to them ever since a particularly surreal Bloodstock hangover in 2014, and as such, they have a dear place in my heart. I’ve seen them north of 20 times and thus ‘Nuclear Fallout Machine Sentience’, ‘Master of the Dojo’, and ‘Release the Krakhen’ aren’t new to me, but I am glad they’re available to blast through my speakers at home.
‘Nuclear Fallout Machine Sentience’ is an oddly moody opener for Evil Scarecrow. It’s a nice counterpoint to the bellowing ‘RISE’ from “Galactic Hunt”. I can easily imagine this being a soundtrack to a Sci-Fi teen drama, where everyone is suddenly wearing make-up (Nice 90s TV reference there for those of you who can spot it) and “Prepare for silent running” just before a solo is a nice touch with sampling. I don’t know how they’ve managed it, but the voice of the submarine sounds a bit like a drowning Dr Who baddie to me, and I love it.
‘Shred the Evidence’ is a sudden uptake in pace after the slow burn of the previous track, I’m glad that I’m listening to this at home, as I’m sure I’d have been reaching for the accelerator if I were driving!
‘Shoptimus Prime’, another moody intro here, but then it moves over to causing me some stank-faced slow headbanging in the chorus, which is always a good sign. I can’t help but feel Evil Scarecrow are trying their hand at a bit of social commentary on ‘Consumerism’, which I applaud. For a band that makes such excellent use of samples, the only thing that’s missing was the Shopify cash register noise!
‘Green Bin Day’. Evil Scarecrow has gone Pop-Punk and I AM HERE FOR IT. I think we have all felt the frustration of getting the bins wrong, so here is a song that will speak to us, and frankly, it’s a bop! I think I can play this to non-metal fans and they’ll be dancing along (and washing out their cans before recycling them).
‘Master of the Dojo’, another song that will be familiar to the Evil Scarecrow fans who have been seeing them for a while. It has a brilliant refrain in “STRIKE FIRST, SHOW NO MERCY” that does a great job at some competitive crowd singing along.
‘Release the Krakhen’. So you’re telling me this isn’t about a lady giving away drugs in Glasgow, but actually about a titanic mutated chicken? Anyway, I’m pretty certain Dr Hell (PhD or medical I wonder?) wrote this backwards from the phrase “massive cock-eral” and the rest is history. I can’t separate this from live performance, which includes said titanic mutated chicken and audience participation “buck-auks!”, one of the most enjoyable parts of seeing Evil Scarecrow live is the joy they bring to their performance, and Dr Hell laughing his ass off at the audiences’ efforts.
‘Welly in the Mud’, a lament that we can all understand and very much seems based upon lived experiences at download (drownload!/brownload depending on year…). It drops in a gloriously heavy, slow headbang-inducing WELLY, WELLY IN THE MUD, WELLY, WELLY IS STUCK, accompanied by Monty Blitzfist’s relentless double kick, and I can’t wait for this live. This track to me is reminiscent of Margate from The Men Who Will Not be Blamed For Nothing, so I hope Andrew O’Neill loves it too!
SEX, SEX, SEX, BOTS! SEX, SEX, SEX, BOTS! ‘Wrath of the Sexbots’ is going to be the earworm of the album. They’re giving me complicated emotions! Should I fear the horde of sex bots… or be excited by them?
Ever thought you made an intelligent observation and then realised you’ve been beaten to the punch? Well, I thought I was being all clever with my ‘just like the 80s’ observations, until I read that Dr Hell had commented that they “rewound to the 80s with “The Future Machine”. It is straight up 80s Stadium Rock. This one feels like the guitar flex, and I can just tell that it must be a joy to play.
Overall, this was a delightful Metal romp to listen to. I’m looking forward immensely to hearing it all in person, and seeing what new Metal panto and actions Evil Scarecrow have in store for us.
666/10
TRACKLISTING:
01. Nuclear Fallout Machine Sentience
02. Shred the Evidence
03. Shoptimus Prime
04. Green Bin Day
05. Master of the Dojo
06. Release the Krakhen
07. Welly in the Mud
08. Wrath of the Sexbots
09. The Future Machine
LINKS:
Find everything Evil Scarecrow here: https://linktr.ee/evilscarecrow
Find everything Andrew O’Neill here: https://www.andrewoneill.co.uk/
Disclaimer: This review is solely the property of Adam Robinson and Ever Metal. It is strictly forbidden to copy any part of this review, unless you have the strict permission of both parties. Failure to adhere to this will be treated as plagiarism and will be reported to the relevant authorities.
