Dead Harrison – None For All
Dead Harrison – None For All
Self-Released
Release Date: 24/05/23
Running Time: 46:22
Review by Dark Juan
7/10
Earworms! Why? What is the reason for them? Why are they rarely anything you want to listen to, let alone want reverberating around your already overfilled and abused headspace? My head, over the past few weeks has been filled with everything from ‘Onward Christian Soldiers’ (I’m not even a fucking Christian) to ‘Boogie Wonderland’ by Earth, Wind and Fire, to fucking ‘Return of The Mack’ by Mark Morrison. Where’s the bloody Anaal Nathrakh, or A Dark Halo, or The Chronicles Of Manimal and Samara, or pMad, or bands that I actually like? Why am I being subjected to some fucking muppet-sounding R’n’B fat man in fucking stupid looking shades, or the marching songs of the False God and not the righteous music of the alternative and the Extreme? I am a good man; I look after people who need it and am a kind and caring friend and I frankly do NOT fucking deserve to have my own subconscious sabotage me with the fucking likes of CeeLo Green. I mean, if it was En Vogue circa 2000 that would at least provide some top-quality mental eye candy and ‘Free Your Mind’ was an absolutely banging song, but Mark fucking Morrison sounding like Kermit the bastard Frog with laryngitis? Non, merci beaucoup.
Fuck you, diseased brain of Dark Juan. Fuck you and your endless tortures. This is why I drink so much. It’s the only way to shut the flabby grey bastard up…
It’s got worse since I last wrote the above. Now it’s ‘Young Girl’ by Gary Puckett and the Union Gap. Oh wait, that paean to underage love (and in the case of Gazza P, sex as well) apparently isn’t enough torture. Now, I have ‘Girl, You’ll Be A Woman, Soon’ by Neil Diamond as well. Both are excellent tunes to be sure, but the subject matter is more than a bit dodgy, especially considering Dark Juan’s career in wrangling recalcitrant youngsters…
Time to reorient my attention and return to the righteous path of the Extreme. The Platter of Splatter™ has been daubed with expletives and has been roundly abused and it has been instructed by play the latest record by New Hampshire’s Dead Harrison. It has duly done so because facing my wrath at the moment would be an unpleasant experience for everyone…
The record opens with ‘None For All’, which ably apes the likes of ‘The Misinterpretation Of Silence and It’s Disastrous Consequences’ by Type O Negative, with 28 seconds of… nothing, before a Rob Zombie-esque sample kicks off the proceedings properly with ‘Monolith Lord’, being a meaty slab of hyperfuzzed Doom Metal that drags slowly until a surprisingly sprightly middle section where the band appear to have lost all their drugs and attained a brief moment or two of sobriety, where they meld very Gothic, haunting backing vocals over a bit of Entombed-like Death n’ Roll. ‘Hurricane Hell’ is a different kettle of fish, though. It starts with some ferocious riffing before referencing some Gothic credentials by having a clean, waltz-time section with a mournful vocal on the verse. This isn’t kept up for long, though, as the mournful vocal gets hammered half to death by serious distortion levels for the chorus and bridge. Dark Juan is somewhat confused. Doom Metal that has been slammed into Gothic Rock at insane velocities doesn’t work as well as you might think it does. At least to my ear. However, that could be because I am approaching full on Eurovision mental mode for it is tonight (I wrote this review on 11th May).
‘Terror Grinder’ is different again. Possibly the first ever Psychedelic Punk track Dark Juan has ever heard, the lyrics are splendidly silly and jolly good fun to boot and the whole song has that same edgy, out-there-on-the-ragged-edge-of-experience feeling that Hawkwind evinced, especially at their most LSD-raddled. The vocals indeed sound like Dave Brock and friends are actually singing on this song in the verses. They aren’t, unless Dead Harrison aren’t telling us something important… This is a real highlight of the album so far, being joyously silly and showing a band that have leaned into their sense of humour and having deployed mirth missiles most marvellously, mates.
However, to say that Dead Harrison are influenced by the likes of the Sisters Of Mercy, Siouxsie and Type O Negative is… a bit of a stretch, at times. To be fair, the band does state quite clearly “…and many others”. There are parts, like the introduction and the verses to ‘Shadow Prism’, where the gentle chiming of guitar and the mournful wailing nod towards the leather, PVC, and taffeta clad denizens of the shadows but there isn’t ENOUGH of it. ‘Shadow Prism’ builds throughout the song from Gothic Rock, to amusingly pompous Ghost soloing, to fuck knows what else – Doom Metal with a twin, Trad Metal guitar attack. Don’t get me wrong, I fucking love this song because it is a real humdinger that goes in several directions and keeps the listener on their toes throughout its torturous eight minutes of twisting and turning. ‘Doom Train’ starts with an almost- Shoegaze like vibe, its unhurried groove carrying the song through to a very juddery conversion to Punky Doom Metal for the chorus. It has the feel of a filler about it, as the last couple of minutes of the song is the band just playing things faster and faster until it becomes glorious, discordant noise.
The Patented Dark Juan Blood Splat Rating System is confused because Dead Harrison are trying to cover too many bases at once. By all means be a Doom Metal band or a Gothic Metal band, but the two combined are poles apart and virtually impossible to combine effectively. Dead Harrison are a much better Gothic Metal band than they are a Doom Metal band, in Dark Juan’s humble opinion, but this record still has moments of absolute delight on it in the forms of ‘Terror Grinder’, ‘Shadow Prism’ and ‘Beach Zombies’ (Gothic Surf Rock, anyone?) but it’s patchy and there are too many ideas trying to be executed all at once. Far better to drip feed innovation rather than clobber the poor listener with it all at once, and therefore Dead Harrison are awarded 7/10 for a record that tries rather too hard to be original, yet still has an infectious sense of humour and some corking tunes.
TRACKLISTING:
01. None For All
02. Monolith Lord
03. Hurricane Hell
04. Terror Grinder
05. Shadow Prism
06. Doom Train
07. Beach Zombies
08. Dogs Baking Dogs
09.Gods Making Gods
10. Francis Forever
LINE-UP:
Drae the Undead aka Andre Dumont – Lead vocals and rhythm guitar.
Shawn the Dead aka Shawn Dube – Lead guitar, second vocalist.
Jason Skulls aka Jason Freitas – Bass, third vocalist.
Thraxx aka Axile Beighley – Drums.
LINKS:
Disclaimer: This review is solely the property of Dark Juan and Ever Metal. It is strictly forbidden to copy any part of this review, unless you have the strict permission of both parties. Failure to adhere to this will be treated as plagiarism and will be reported to the relevant authorities.
