Vexing Hex – Solve Et Coagula
Vexing Hex – Solve Et Coagula
Wise Blood Records
Release Date: 21/06/2024
Running Time: 39:38
Review by Dark Juan
274,582,763/10
I am being impeded by the newest Smellhound, Mossy Boggart Rowan Grimshaw Cravensworth IV because I won’t feed him chicken at his convenience. This has upset the furry little freeloader, and he is currently employing the Paw of Doom™ upon my poor pooter by repeatedly battering the Shift key, so my erudite words appear like a CoNsPiRaCy ThEoRiSt hAs bEeN aT mY cOmPuTeR. Mrs Dark Juan is chortling at the antics of the hairy little shit and my misfortune, so I have reminded her that she forgot the name for a motorway once and described it as a “Shitty big person road”. And that she once scared the living shit out of a poor Muslim lady by trying to get in her car, having mistaken it for the Schwerer Gothikpanzer. That has chastened her. Anyway, she is currently savaging her own imagination with a collection of Thomas Ligotti stories, so I have put on my headphones and activated the gloriously appointed Platter of Splatter™, this time to have a listen to the rabid stylings of Illinois’s Vexing Hex on their sophomore effort, “Solve et Coagula”.
Let us plunge into something that is playing havoc with Dark Juan’s imagination…
Immediately, on the introduction to ‘Into The Night’, Dark Juan is assailed by the similarities of Vexing Hex to Ghost. That most polarising of bands is a brave influence these days as they scale ever greater heights, but Dark Juan will not be taking questions on the following assertion:
Ghost are fucking BRILLIANT and the best thing to happen to Metal in the past ten years.
I will die on that hill, now and forever.
Vexing Hex share the same sensitivity to the most classic of Metal as do Papa and the Nameless Ghouls, as well as the same impish sense of fun, although their music also incorporates the likes of The Damned at their most Gothic and pompous, the robotic machine Pop of Devo and the sexy Satanic sultriness of Evil Elvis himself and the rest of Danzig, but the overwhelming influence on Vexing Hex is Ghost. The guitar sound is tremendously similar to the one used on the likes of “Opus Eponymous” and the vocals of Cadaverus, Lord of Dread (be warned, I FUCKING LOVE SILLY NAMES) operate in that same slightly disturbing higher-than-it-should-be register that Papa Emeritus employs (yes, I know that it’s really Tobias Forge, but I have no interest in reality. It’s fucking dull 99% of the time and I want cartoon Satanic priests and Lords of Ridiculousness and secrecy and hidden identities) and the music shares that (‘One Thousand Eyes’ is so Ghost like on the intro I nearly played something off “Meliora” after it) same knowing, winking at the fans quality as the Swedish pseudo-Satanists. The chorus is also straight out of the same anthemic bastard playbook, and it is reverberating around my skull like a demon released!
It’s absolutely bewitching melodic… witchery, so far. The cosmic accident that has brought Vexing Hex to my attention appears to have made an acolyte out of Dark Juan is spectacularly short order. The keyboard work of (Gods be praised, I love silliness) Viscera, Lord of Torment is simply spectacular – it ebbs and flows and takes command of songs as well as embellishing the melodic vocals and the pieces as a whole, sometimes with delicate flourishes and sometimes with the meatiest of church organs – ‘Vviccaphobia’ being a sublime seven minutes of melding ‘He Is’ and ‘Year Zero’.
It is fair to say that Dark Juan is feeling like praising Satan at the base of the altar of these pretenders to Ghost’s throne right now. They have that same appreciation of the classics – Ten Years After, Mountain and Atomic Rooster and Iron Butterfly all feature in the highly polished and extremely accessible sound of Vexing Hex. They also have the sensitivity of knowing that a fucking awesome Poppy hook is one of the most irresistible things in the world, and it is fair to say that every song on this album would have lighters in the air, thousands of devoted followers screaming themselves hoarse to every chorus, every goth girl in a clear half-mile radius having unaccountably dissolving underwear, and frankly it has a sense of fun and performance that transcends the music because of the comic-book, overblown drama of it all.
Just like Ghost. I keep coming back to it because they are the overriding influence at work here. Dark Juan would give at least one testicle to see the various Lords of Vexing Hex, Vessel and Sleep Token and Papa and the Ghouls on the same bill. Dark Juan would die happy and more than sated after that.
Thematically, the album explores alchemy and transformation, death and rebirth, light and darkness, existential dread, as well as psychological horror and eldritch realms and it is well known that your faithful correspondent really gets off on that kind of shit – the band do state that they take elements of Occult Doom, Traditional Heavy Metal, 80’s New Wave, Grunge, and Prog Rock. I have heard pretty much zero Grunge in the music of Vexing Hex, although there is more than a soupcon of New Wave and a bit of Post-Punk slithering around in the background of the music too. It needs a touch more cartoon Satanism, though.
I’m joking. Vexing Hex, although they operate in the same musical continuum as Ghost, are a completely different concept and their execution is quite different too. They are more concerned with witches and the darker side of folklore and life rather than just trying to shoehorn Satan into as many songs as they can or aping 60s Psychedelic Rock for a giggle. Or covering Roky Erickson.
Production wise, this is as fresh and as sharp as anything else out there – it is quite lightweight, but if you go back to the likes of say, Iron Maiden’s third and fourth albums, or Helloween’s “Keeper Of The Seven Keys”, you’ll totally understand where Vexing Hex are aiming for with their sound, and Liminos, Lord of Illusion’s (fucking BRILLIANT!!! I’m still giggling like a schoolgirl at the names of the band) guitar work is stellar and he’s a fucking tasty soloist as well. The rhythm section (comprised of Hastur, Lord of Madness on bass, and Radament, Lord of Despair on drums – ha ha ha ha ha ha ha my eyes are watering) is tighter than a Yorkshireman’s arse when he’s asked to buy a round and the whole band have that elusive quality – they sound like they are having the best time ever while they are recording this album and that geniality, that tongue in cheek winking at the audience and the clear love they have for Trad Metal and theatricality makes for a fucking intoxicating listen and Dark Juan has totally destroyed the Calder Valley Sex Wee Drainage System once again. All hail Vexing Hex!!!
Needless to say, if you like Ghost and Sleep Token, you are going to fucking adore Vexing Hex. The purists are going to absolutely fucking hate them and claim that they aren’t Metal, but I contend that what they have done, just like Ghost, is Metal as fuck and has more to do with actual Metal than any amount of fat, old, bearded guys claiming that they are too Pop and there’s no grunting. They can shove their opinions up their stodgy, plump arses and swivel on them until they squeal like pigs on a honeymoon. There was always more to Metal than out and out power and rage. The 80s were the absolute pinnacle of Metal being melodic and accessible.
The Patented Dark Juan Blood Splat Rating System awards Vexing Hex 274,582,763/10 for a record that has charmed Dark Juan to the point of moving to Illinois just so he can be closer to Vexing Hex.
TRACKLISTING:
01. Into the Night
02. Besmirched
03. One Thousand Eyes
04. Vviccaphobia
05. Solve et Coagula!
06. Mind Funeral
07. Poison Apple
08. Sarcophagus
09. Revivified
LINE-UP:
Cadaverus, Lord of Dread – Lead vocals, guitar
Hastur, Lord of Madness – Bass, vocals
Liminos, Lord of Illusion – Guitar, vocals
Radament, Lord of Despair – Vocals, drums
Viscera, Lord of Torment – Keyboards
LINKS:
Disclaimer: This review is solely the property of Dark Juan and Ever Metal. It is strictly forbidden to copy any part of this review, unless you have the strict permission of both parties. Failure to adhere to this will be treated as plagiarism and will be reported to the relevant authorities.
