Christian Mistress – Children of the Earth
Christian Mistress – Children of the Earth
Cruz Del Sur Music
Release Date: 26/02/2025
Review by Rory Bentley
9/10
When I embarked on my journey at Ever-Metal back in 2022, I was appalled by the quality of much of the online Rock and Metal media landscape, namely the more independent sites. I thought too many people were slapping over-generous scores on the most derivative, route one music pumped out by either old farts that need to move aside for newer sounds, or younger bands stuck in the past trying to ape a bygone sound. I was arriving to throw my critical, innovation-craving hat in the ring and bring a more stringent brand of writing and scoring to the table, rather than fawning over some ‘legendary’ (read: were around in the 80s, nobody cared then either and they didn’t have the dignity to call it a day) British Thrash band because they let me buy them a pint and have a selfie with them.
I still stand by this approach, however sometimes stuff just fucking rocks, and the fact that Seattle’s Christian Mistress lean so heavily into classic Heavy Metal with very little attempt to modernise or innovate with it makes zero difference to the immense enjoyment I get out of this record. Simply put, if you write great songs – and there’s 8 of them shits on here – then I will bang my bald, bulbous head.
Despite having a core instrumental sound that draws heavily from classic NWOBHM and early Dio in terms of chunky riffage and soaring melody, “Children of The Earth” somehow stands out amongst so many of the retro-revivalists. This is in no small part down to firecracker frontwoman Christine Davis who brings a swaggering Punk energy and Joan Jett-style cool to the party, along with a cracking ear for a huge vocal hook. I’ve had some catchy stuff come through my inbox the last few months, as in radio-ready, Poptastic stuff such as my beloved NFO and a pretty bloody good Avantasia album, yet the killer chorus to ‘Use Your Voice’ has fought off almost everything for consistent space in my head. It is not just her way with an earworm, though- the way she spits and snarls her way through the verses of opener ‘City of Gold’ really gives everything an extra edge. I like a muscular bloke singing about cocks and dragons on my NWOTHM as much as the next man, but sometimes you need something new on the mic.
The quality of the riffs conjured up by Johnny Wulf and Tim Diedrich is another massive string to the bow. These riffs feel like they’ve been around forever not merely down to their antiquated sound, but because they are so well crafted, you’d be forgiven for thinking Vivian Campbell wrote them.Combined with a ragged, raw, and rowdy production and you’re onto a winner here. Recorded on a 4 track reel-to-reel in their native Olympia at High Command studios every song crackles with analogue warmth while still remaining instrumental clarity thanks to an immaculate and kinetic performance from the band. Sometimes the mix is a little too trebly for my tastes, as there are a few parts that are a little too piercing when listening on headphones, but it’s not exactly the first Bathory album so it’s a minor grievance of mine.
By the time total rager and uplifting horn raiser ‘Shadow’ caps off these lighting fast 33 minutes with the glorious refrain of “Tonight, we can be anything!”, I’m reaching for that play button and probably a cold beverage before I even realise what I’m doing. It’s been 10 years since the band’s studio debut, for long term fans I’m sure it was worth the wait, but as a new convert to the cause I pray that Christian Mistress drop their next release in swifter fashion as there’s very few bands making NWOTHM of such exquisite vintage. And like I said at the start – it just fucking rocks!
‘Lake Of Memory’ Official Audio
TRACKLISTING:
01. City of Gold
02. Voiceless
03. Demon’s Night
04. Love of the World
05. Mythmaker
06. Death Blade
07. Lake of Memory
08. Shadow
LINKS:
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