AKTOR – Professori (Season Two)
AKTOR – Professori (Season Two)
High Roller Records
Release Date: 28/11/25
Running Time: 46:40
Review by Dark Juan
8/10
I have been listening to some deeply affecting and emotionally wrought music recently. This has led Dark Juan to thinking about his mortality and other deep stuff that he normally does not concern himself with, because it never ends well. It normally ends up with Dark Juan in a strange town, normally covered with blood and not knowing how he got there, what has happened and just why there are police sirens all around him, as well as being cross that he has ruined yet another little-known Yorkshire band’s t shirt with claret. Turns out that when you are stabbing someone in the neck they are like a fucking geyser of gore, and this is inconvenient when you are trying to get away, as constabularies will ask you all sorts of uncomfortable questions about just why you are covered in blood and what you are doing with the knife in your hand. This is where Dark Juan’s usual glibness will inevitably get him into trouble, as the police don’t like smart-arse answers and tend to look negatively on jokes when you have just ended someone.
Or so my dream last night told me. Dark Juan, as you all know, is a preacher of togetherness, equality and love. Normally fuelled by psychedelics and other party treats and some small matters that other people may consider perverse. I say fie to them, cock an almighty snook and continue on much as before.
Still, I have decided to change up my listening for this review because you can only enjoy so much miserable before it starts negatively affecting you. Instead, I am going to listen to some “Weird music for weird people”, as vocalist Professor Black puts it, in AKTOR’s latest release, “Professori (Season Two)”. Let us unlimber the Platter of Splatter ™ and place this offering upon it.
This is rather more lightweight than the previous dozen or so albums I have listened to, and it makes a rather welcome change from doom and gloom. Its poppy and uplifting even if the subject matter of the lyrics is not – for example ‘He Never Came Home’ ends with the line “He never came home because he’s probably dead!”.
Stirring stuff.
I should point out that “Professori (Season Two)” is something of a concept album, based on a Nordic Noir cop drama, each episode being represented by a song. This is not a concept I have come across before, and it makes for an interesting new take on storytelling in music. Henc, this album must be listened to in song order for it to make any sense at all, but thankfully the band have the chops to make each song individually listenable as well – the music encompasses everything from B-52s Pop bounciness to New Wave Talking Heads abstruseness and welds it to a Seventies Hard Rock and Psychedelic vibe that permeates every song. Its certainly eclectic, and Dark Juan fucking adores Talking Heads, so AKTOR are on to a right winner so far.
I’d also add in some proper 80s Hard Rock as an influence as AKTOR are no strangers to rather tasty anthemic choruses, as well as a smidgeon of Gothic Rock (‘Nemesis’ is really a Poppier Jesus and Mary Chain song) with that chorus, “You are my nemesis, you are my nothing”, and their liberal use of massive vocal harmonies on their previously mentioned colossal choruses.
The music is upbeat and curiously reminiscent of Coheed and Cambria’s Claudio Sanchez’s side project The Prize Fighter Inferno – deeply idiosyncratic and not a little strange, for example beneath the guitars and the epic line “City Hall is coming for my job” there is a distinctive and insistent Stylophone melody line which is lodged like a grey matter eating tapeworm in Dark Juan’s backbrain and is slowly squeezing cognition out of it.
The problem I have is that AKTOR is not really Metal. It is Hard Rock at the outside. This is not a criticism per se, and I have frequently broken my own rules about what I am supposed to write about for Ever-Metal.com, but AKTOR sits a little awkwardly with my usual listening. This is not to detract from the conspicuous brilliance of the music and the concept. I just wanted to mention that AKTOR are not the last word in heaviness, and this is supposed to be a review and you people out there need to know this.
I will freely admit that AKTOR are an unusual prospect, and this is acknowledged by the band themselves – in the words of vocalist Professor Black, “It is correct that AKTOR is not for everyone. If you like it, I’m happy, and if you don’t, sure, that’s ok. Generally, the conservatives know who they are, and they won’t even bother.”
Why would you want them to? Conservative people are fucking BORING, listening to tedious middle of the road music, or even worse, fucking Coldplay, and thinking it is genre stretching and dynamic when in reality it is fucking appallingly beige bollocks because conservative people don’t generally have any original thoughts in their middle-management-bound heads and this is reflected in their earthy tones of dun clothing and their soulless, heart-destroying plain white or magnolia homes, kept carefully neutral to maximise resale values instead of actually being their sanctuary and having some form of interest or uniqueness, IKEA and Jysk ornaments sparsely applied throughout their beige boxes, staring open-mouthed at whatever z-list “celebrity” is being evicted from the fake jungle on Saturday night primetime TV rather than going out and having a fucking LIFE!
The man who just wrote that rant is currently seated on an expensive sofa wearing a grey cardigan. But that’s because it is cold in Yorkshire and is not a usual sartorial choice, evidenced by the Lawnmower Deth t shirt being worn beneath it.
So, yeah, Dark Juan absolutely fucking digs AKTOR. The brisk nature of the music, the story in the lyrics and the uniqueness of the concept have all tickled my somewhat jaded and overstimulated fancy, as well as Professor Black’s voice being more than usually pleasing to Dark Juan’s ear at the moment. Clean vocals are a pleasure at the moment after listening to so much roaring recently.
The Patented Dark Juan Blood Splat Rating System (Patentoitu Dark Juan -veriroiskeiden arviointijärjestelmä suomalaisille ystävilleni. Täysin rehellisesti sanottuna kirjoitan tätä Google Kääntäjällä, koska en osaa suomea, enkä tiedä mistä aloittaa, olen vasta oppinut Kuusysi Lahti jalkapallojoukkueen ääntämisen, ja pyydän myös anteeksi sitä hienon kielenkäytönne täydellistä pilaamista, jota Kääntäjä epäilemättä tekee. Tein tämän vain siksi, että kaksi kolmasosaa AKTORista on suomalaisia. Katsotaanpa, kuinka montaa ihmistä pystyn loukkaamaan tällä kertaa!) awards AKTOR 8/10 for a truly excellent record that has much to enjoy, although I am not sure just how accessible their music would be for purists. Dark Juan is most assuredly not a purist and has enjoyed the fuck out of AKTOR. I only bother about genres for descriptive purposes and otherwise I am not concerned and would advise you all out there to check out AKTOR because they really are awesome.
TRACKLISTING:
01. He Never Came Home
02. Just One Hand
03. Nemesis
04. Politics Politics
05. Idiot Brother
06. Another Piece
07. Too Close (Still Not Close Enough)
08. Back on the Case
09. Children Always Know
10. Helicopter
11. Bigger Picture
LINE-UP:
Professor Black – Vocals
Jussi Lehtisalo – Guitars
Tomi Leppänen – Drums
LINKS:
Disclaimer: This review is solely the property of Dark Juan and Ever Metal. It is strictly forbidden to copy any part of this review, unless you have the strict permission of both parties. Failure to adhere to this will be treated as plagiarism and will be reported to the relevant authorities.